Sunday, July 18, 2010

Third Port: Finding Calm Seas

I promised myself I would not do it. I told everyone, "No. Not me. Won't happen." Yet, here I sit at my kitchen table listening to two little girls fight naptime and trying to slowly untangle the knots inside me. You see, the librarians at our local library tried to stir Sir MMH Hubby's pot a bit the other day by giving him the countdown until school starts. A countdown until his summer break is at an end and the madness begins... What they didn't know was that he sees the glass half full. "I still have nearly six weeks left! How great is that!" he replied. "Wow," I thought. "He really is enjoying this summer and not stressed out about the coming fall."

"Wait. Did she say SIX weeks?"

And the rocket plummeted into my stomach. ACK! Six weeks and I am somehow going to pull together homeschool for four kids, including Miss Bug and Miss Bear who have most decidedly entered the loving two's. AM I INSANE??? Breathe. Breathe. And breathe again.

First reminder: We prayed about this. We prayed A LOT about this. God is in this. Rather, this is His. He can do all that He says He can do. AND I can do all that He says I can do through Christ who gives me strength.

Second reminder: DO NOT EXPECT A PERFECT YEAR. I don't...or at least I tell myself I don't. However, I have this picture or script in my head of how I would like it to be. It is not perfect, but it's a pretty big picture...and I'm working with a very small budget and first time cast. I should probably scale it back a bit.

Third reminder: My twin tots will only be twin tots for so long. Our first year of homeschooling will mirror the rest of our chaotic lives, but it will get better as routines are refined and children get older.

Fourth reminder: My family is worth it. No matter what is in store for me, my family is worth it.

Ahhh...feeling a bit better now. I am headed to my notebook to figure out what I feel is essential, and what is something that may not be possible this year. (Bye bye pocket calendar. We will get to you someday. This year we will be using my handy dandy calendar and some posterboard.) I have had many times of thanks over these past few weeks which I will share later...I just thought others may like to know that they are not alone in feeling uncertain, uneasy, or completely loco as the school year quickly approaches. *smile*

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